softness doesn't equal weakness


Softness doesn’t equal weakness  in fact I feel, more and more, that softness is a long lost strength in a world that can be very hard, full of sharp edges and schedules and putting on a mask in order to be accepted, to avoid judgement, disappointment or upsetting others.

I don’t think softness means to be walked all over, to be overly polite, to stay quiet, small or easily swayed.

I see softness more as compassion. More as the bravery to spend time alone with yourself. To do things differently. To not have to fill your schedule to the brim to feel validated. To not apologise for what you want. Softness as the ability to smile at yourself when you fuck up. To be kind to others when they do too. To listen to opinions that are not your own and be open to them, but comfortable to disagree.

I see softness as the ability to remain as yourself without building up walls around your edges. Softness as fully putting yourself out into the world - knowing that will be uncomfortable at times, and allowing discomfort to move in and move out again. Softness as not meeting anger with anger, but with steadiness, strength and understanding.

To remain soft in this word is a challenge. I spent so much of my teenage years and early twenties trying to be less soft, trying to toughen up, trying to fit in, trying to be like everyone else. It felt safer, more secure, I could be smaller, stand out less.

The more I embrace softness and sensitivity the stronger I become. The strength is internal, rather than superficial. The softness is on the surface. When the strength is quiet, deep and internal, weakness does not exist.

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